i just has the LONGEST-phone-conversation EVER… when guys are on the phone.. 5mins would be considered LONG… i didn’t know THIS could mean a lot different from ‘girl talk’…. YEHH!!!… i ended up talking/being on the phone for 2HOURS and 16 MINUTES.. now thats way TOO long… (no?)

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If i was getting paid from hearing the word “OMG you are so skinny!” I would’ve been a millionaire by now. but see, who could’ve thought I used to be this “HEALTHY” little kid. ahhahah! i DONT KNOW what they had been feeding me but heck I look pretty damn big. (not that it’s a bad thing)

I honestly HAVE NO IDEA how i ended up being skinny. Since grade1 I know i started to loose weight, it continued on the 2nd grade and so on. I never gained the weight back, so I guess thats what they mean by “baby FATS” — literally.

ANYHOW! I’ll let you enjoy few memorabilias I dug up this morning from our ancient photo album! I WAS BLOWN AWAY!… lol and YES you can make fun of them, I FINISHED making fun of myself thru these pictures, i wouldn’t mind being a clown every now and then.

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sometimes, we go through things in life which seems to be NOT MAKING sense at all. sometimes, you would need time to think about things and go over every single one of them to figure out what’s the best thing, not only for yourself, but also for the people around you; people you care about, and people that care about you in return.

Lately I’ve been having this dilemma, and the more i put it aside and escape it, the more it comes back haunting me! This is also the reason why i’m stucked here right now istead of taking the next step. There are many paths to take, it gets so confussing. but what am I suppose to do. see i’m running out of time and I can’t afford another year of thinking over these things or I’ll go kuh kuh!…

I am not a risk taker, I’ve always want to go on the safe side… who doesn’t wanna be safe… WHY TAKE THE RISK if you can be safe? but see, life is a gamble, you can only gain more if you risk MORE and I don’t think I’m strong enough to take the challenge. — insecurities(?) what if I’m not good enough? what if this isn’t for me? what if I’d end up failing? there’s so much things that could go wrong… only God knows whats up there for me. i wish i could have a free pass and find out what’s the best thing for me!

oh well, I DONT KNOW ANYMORE, nor i care…